Ned checks in on dead Hugh. The sisters are stitching him up and Ser Barristan has stood vigil. Ned and Barristan discuss the “draw” and where the boy got money for fancy armor. It's clear Ned is suspicious. Ned goes to see Robert who is intent on jousting, but Ned appeals to his pride (they would let him win).
At the Tourney the Knight of Flowers gives Sansa a red rose then knocks the Mountain off his horse. Littlefinger whispers Loras knew his mare was in heat. The Mountain then slaughters his horse and comes after Loras, but the Hound intervenes. The Mountain stalks off, pissed, and Loras raises the Hound's hand in victory. “I am no ser!”
Cat pulls one over on the masses. She has announced loudly and often she is taking Tyrion to Winterfell, but off they go to the Vale. They are attacked by Hill Tribes and Tyrion holds his own, actually saving Catelyn, and leading to some excellent humor.
Brann, at lessons, shows how angry he is at his mother but takes heart at the idea he might learn to shoot arrows from horseback.
There is a gratuitous sex scene then Roz pokes at Theon's emotional wounds.
Arya chases cats.
Varys warns Ned that the king is in danger and tells him of the tears of Lys... then we see him in the dungeons with Illyrio where Arya overhears discussion of Dany, killing the hand, and plans... “The lion and wolf will soon be at each others' throat. War is upon us.”
Petyr and Varys have a pissing match.
Arya tries to tell Ned about what she overheard but she understood too little, then Yoren shows up and tells him about Catelyn taking the Imp.
In the small council meeting Ned and Robert have a falling out because Ned refuses to be involved in an assassination of Daenarys. Petyr then shows up and says if Ned will hang out a bit, he will take him to the last person John Arryn talked to.
Cat arrives at the Eyrie to find Lysa nursing her 8 year old. Tyrion is put in a sky cell.
Loras plants the idea Renly should be king.
Robert and Cersei have sort of a lovely chat.
Ned finds Robert's latest bastard and then is attacked by Jaime Lannister outside. Ned's men are killed and Ned is left badly wounded.
New Places and Faces
The Eyrie (The Vale and the road leading to it): The Vale is entirely enclosed with mountains to the west (and running all through it) and sea to the other three sides. It is the kingdom easiest to defend by far—only the Iron Born would really have a chance and they are on the opposite side of the country from them. Some of the land is rich for farming and the climate conducive to a variety of crops (temperate). Their seaports also make them a good place for trade, though much of the shore is inhospitable.
Currently ruling the Vale is Lord Arryn who is eight. And still breast feeding. Ew. I am totally a breastfeeding advocate, but anyone old enough to read has probably outgrown it. In fact except in exceptional children, talking in full sentences is closer to the line I'd draw, but never mind. Robin Arryn's mother is a bit of a loon. (and in this storyline we are getting to know Bronn for the first time, though he has not yet been named... still, one of the best lines of the season—see below)
Dungeons of King's Landing: Holy crap, look at those dragon skulls! At King's Landing we also meet Ser Loras and discover his romance with Renly.
Notable Quotes
Bronn: You need a woman. Nothing like a woman after a fight.
Tyrion: I'm willing if she is.
Varys: I suffered an early mutilation. Some doors close forever. Others open in unexpected places. (I thought this was a nice foreshadowing for Brann)
Tyrion: The Eyrie. They say she's impregnable.
Bronn: Give me ten good men and some climbing spikes. I'll impregnate the bitch.
Robert: I can't even remember what she looked like. All I know is she was the only thing I ever wanted. Someone took her away from me and seven kingdoms couldn't fill the hole she left behind.
Analysis
So the plot thickens as we see whoever was behind John Arryn's death is willing to keep killing for it and as Catelyn basically has declared war by taking Tyrion prisoner. The show does a brilliant job of showing somethings very quickly—like how unhinged Lysa Arryn is sitting there nursing her much-too-old child. And Ned realized he's made a mistake—Robert is not the man he thought he was. But he is still loved so Ned isn't willing to leave before finding out if Robert is really in trouble... The pace was good and a lot of balls are in the air here.
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