The Rewatch Project: Season 5, Episode 1: The Wars to Come

Recap

Young Cersei and her friend Malara traipse through the woods to the house of a woods witch. They wake the woman and Cersei rudely lets her know she is not nearly as impressive as she's heard, then demands the woman tell their future. The witch gives her a knife and says she needs to taste her blood so Cersei slices her thumb and the woman sucks it, then says Cersei can ask three questions. Cersei asks when she will marry the prince. The witch says she will marry the queen. Cersei confirms she will be queen, and the witch confirms, but finishes that it will be until one younger and more beautiful replaces her and takes all she holds dear. And finally Cersei asks about children. The king will have twenty and Cersei three. Gold will be their crowns and gold their shrouds. Meaning they will die before Cersei.

Adult Cersei rides in a litter to the sept. She demands to go in alone and finds Jaime standing watch over Tywin's body. Jaime says the vague “they” will try to tear them apart now, but Cersei puts the blame solidly on Jaime for letting Tyrion go. She kisses Tywin's head and leaves again.

Tyrion peeks out a hole in his crate as Varys pries it open. Tyrion dives for the wine and feels sorry for himself. They are at the home of Illario Mopatis (where Dany and Viserys lived for a time). Varys gives a pretty darned good sales pitch for at least meeting Danaerys.

The slaves and Unsullied pull down the harpy in Meereen, then an Unsullied goes to a whore for a snuggle. Unfortunately, as they settle in, she slits his throat. He looks up to see the Harpy's mask. When Dany learns she insists he will have a burial in the Temple of the Graces. This will piss off the Sons of the Harpy, but she says that is good. Angry snakes stick their necks out, which makes it easier to chop off their heads. Missendei then finds Grey Worm, trying to understand why Unsullied would seek prostitutes.

Jon trains Ollie at Castle Black. Gilly asks if Sam should be training, then they fret about Ser Alliser's views of wildlings. If Ser Alliser is made Lord Commander, Gilly won't be allowed to stay. Sam says where she goes, he goes. Melisandre comes to Jon and says the King wants to see him, then she rides the lift with him, asking awkwardly if he is a virgin.

Jon kneels before Stannis. Stannis asks if Jon knows who rules at Winterfell and asks if he doesn't want to root the Boltons out. Jon says he wants a great many things, but he is a sworn brother of the Night's Watch. Davos says some of the brothers feel Jon has too much affinity for the Wildlings. Jon says they are not monsters. Stannis shares his plans and says he needs men. At first Jon misunderstands and says the Night's Watch don't take sides, but Stannis means the wildlings—he will forgive them and give them land if they fight for him. He asks Jon to make the case to Mance.

Sansa, Littlefinger and Lord Royce watch Robin pathetically sparring and discuss his lack of skill, but at least he has an important name. They leave Sweetrobin with Lord Royce to tour the Vale, supposedly to go to The Fingers, though Sansa notes they are going West. He says they are going somewhere Cersei cannot get her hands on Sansa.

Loras Tyrell gives words of comfort to Cersei. She thanks him and blows him off. Lancel shows up, head shaved and in monks robes. Kevan explains that he is a sparrow—a group of religious zealots. Lancel finds Cersei and apologizes to her for leading her to temptation. He also mentions the incident with Robert and his wine. He has found peace in the Light of the Seven and tells her she can too.

Olivar the whore outlines Loras's birthmark, noting it is shaped like Dorne. Margaery burst in, scolding Loras for his lateness. When Olivar leaves she tells Loras he should be more discreet. They discuss Cersei. Margaery sounds like she has a plan.

Tyrion and Varys make jibes, Tyrion still feeling sorry for himself. He asks why Varys freed him. It was for the Seven Kingdoms. Tyrion says he's done with them but Varys points out his skills. He gives his pitch for Danaerys.

Hizdar and Daario return to Meereen and give a positive report. It sounds good, but the Masters want some concessions. They would like to re-open the fighting pits. Dany says no. In bed later Daario says she should open them. He made his way in the world starting in the fighting pits. He also suggests she needs to use her dragons. A dragon queen with no dragons is not a queen. She goes to see them but they're pissed at her.

Jon goes to Mance to tell him what Stannis wants, but Mance already knows. Jon tries to present the importance of saving all his people but Mance ends it with one of the best lines ever: The freedom to make my owns mistakes is all I ever wanted.

Surprise ending...

Mance is walked out to the pyre, tied to a stake and Melisandre gives her pedantic zealot speech then lights him afire. Everyone watches as Mance gets uncomfortable, then the flames reach him. He manages not to scream. Jon leaves, Gilly hides her face and Selyse has an orgasm. Then Jon shoots an arrow into Mance's heard from a walkway.


Discussion

Of course when Cersei asks when she will marry the prince, she is referring to Rhaegar, and when the woods witch says she will marry the King, she thinks that is still who it refers to. And the younger more beautiful queen who will take it all from her? Of course this informs so much about how Cersei behaves first toward Sansa, then Margaery. Finally, I'm disappointed the prophecy didn't mention the Valonqar from the books. The last line in the book is: And when your tears have drowned you, the valonqar shall wrap his hands about your pale white throat and choke the life from you. Powerful stuff. A valonqar, in old Valyrian means “little brother” (both Jaime and Tyrion are younger than Cersei) but it says THE valonqar, not YOUR valonqar, so it may not even be HER little brother. It may be the little brother of anyone she has harmed (the little brother of that queen?) and because High Valyrian is gender bendy, it may not even be a male, but any younger sibling (my money is on Arya).

I am so not a fan of pouty Tyrion. I like Varys here, but Tyrion is hard to watch until later in the season.

Also not thrilled with it being Stannis who wants the Wildlings to come through the wall. Jon makes that decision in the books—he asks for one of ten men to stay and serve at the wall, desperately trying to replenish the men at the Wall. It is a huge part of the reason for what happens at the end of the season.

On watching this episode again, there are only a few things HERE that bug me. Mel's come on to Jon, Tyrion the pathetic depressed imp, Loras so glibly having his fling with Olivar (Loras of the books truly loved Renly. He wasn't some randy slut). But what actually bugs me is stuff they skipped or changed.

The Rewatch Project: Season 4, Episode 10: The Children

Recap

Jon heads north through the wildling dead. He marches into Mance's camp with his arms up. Mance comments on his black cloak and Jon says he's there to negotiate. Mance expresses unhappiness with Jon's lack of loyalty, but Jon says he was always loyal to the Night's Watch. They discuss Ygritte and drink to her, then toast Mag the Mighty and Grenn.

Mance says he's sent 400 men to climb the wall. They don't want to conquer. They just want to get on the other side of the wall. He says if they let him through, no one else will die. Otherwise all of them will. They hear a commotion and Mance wonders if Jon has tricked him, but it is not Jon's men. It's Stannis's army.

Davos introduces Stannis who says it's customary to kneel, but Mance says north of the wall they do not do that.

Qyburn, Pycelle and Cersei look over the Mountain, Pycelle insisting there is nothing else to do but milk of the poppy to make passing more comfortable. Qyburn insists he can. Cersei sends Pycelle away and asks if Qyburn can save the Mountain. He says there is a chance and she promises him anything he needs.

Cersei comes to Tywin about her betrothal. She insists she will stay at King's Landing with her son. She reminds him the lengths she will go to when her son is in danger and threatens that she will burn their house to the ground before leaving Tommen. She says she will tell the truth about her and Jaime. Tywin won't believe it is true at first. His legacy is a lie. She then goes to Jaime and tells him what she did.

Missendei strings out Danaerys's title, then a former slave, a tutor, tells his story and asks if he can sell himself back to his former master. Dany tries to argue, but he has a point, so she allows him to make a contract of not more than one year. A shepherd comes in then, unable to speak the common tongue but tells the story of the thing coming from the sky—the black one... and lays down the burned bones of his daughter. Drogon has not been seen, but Dany takes Rhaegal and Viserion and locks them in the catacombs. Neither is happy.

Aemon says a memorial and they burn the dead Night's Watch brothers. And now their watch is ended. Melissandre spots Jon through the flames.

Jon goes to see Tormund. He asks if Tromund wants to say any words for the wildling dead, but Tormund says the dead won't hear. He asks if Jon loved Ygritte and says she loved him—Tormund knows because she kept talking about killing him. He then says she belongs north of the wall, so Jon takes her body north and builds a pyre by the weirwood.

Hodor pulls Brann and they finally spot the tree. Jojen is having trouble but they've nearly made it. As they climb the hill, the dead start breaking through the snow and grabbing at them. They have to fight. Brann finally wargs into Hodor to give them extra fighting power. It's going well until a white heads for Brann—Summer saves him, but the distraction allows a white to stab Jojen. Then a child comes out with fireballs to help. Jojen insists Meera go with Brann so she kills him first then runs. The child throws fire at Jojen so he won't become a white. The rest of them get into the tree where the whites can't come. The child leads Brann to the three-eyed raven. He tells them Jojen always knew his fate. He has been watching all of them all their lives. He tells Brann he will not walk again, but he will fly.

Brienne scolds Pod as the horses have disappeared. In searching Brienne comes upon Arya practicing her water dancing. Arya warns the Hound (who is off screen) that people are coming. Brienne greets Arya. They discuss swords and who taught them to fight.

It's all good until the Hound comes and Pod recognizes him. Brienne tells Arya she swore to her mother to keep her safe. Arya is skeptical and The Hound says there is nowhere safe. The Hound and Brienne have a proper battle. It ends with the Hound thrown over an embankment, but Arya has disappeared. Arya stays hidden until they go, then finds the Hound. He wants her to kill him, but instead she steals his gold and leaves.

Jaime comes for Tyrion. A galley is waiting in the bay for him. Jaime gives instructions and the two hug good-bye. Instead of going directly, however, Tyrion climbs to the Tower of the Hand. He finds Shae in Tywin's bed. Shae calls him “my Lion” before turning to see that it is Tyrion and not Tywin. She grabs a knife. The two fight, and he ends up strangling her with her necklace.

Tyrion apologizes to her, then finds a cross bow and goes to find his father. Tywin is sitting on the privy. Tywin asks who released him. He wants to talk his his room but Tyrion says he can't because he killed Shae there. Tywin asks if he is afraid of a dead whore, to which Tyrion gives a warning not to use the word whore again. When he does, Tyrion puts a bolt into Tywin, who is shocked. He gets mad and says “You are no son of mine” and Tyrion shoots him again.

Varys puts Tyrion in a box for the ship ride, then the bells begin ringing and Varys decided he needs to go, too.

Arya rides to the sea seeking a ship to Eastwatch, the Night's Watch castle on the east shore. The captain she finds is not going north—he tells her there is war north. That he is going home to Bravos. At that point she pulls out her coin from Jaqen and says, “Valar Morghulis.” “Valar Dhohiris,” the captain says back and says Arya will have a cabin. The last shot is of Arya on the prow looking as they cross the sea.

Review

This is another fantastic episode. I really love season 4. When you can say Stannis routing the wildlings is the weakest bit, you know it is great stuff. There was true heartbreak (Dany locking up her dragons after seeing that toddler's bones), there was twisted triumph (Cersei confessing to Tywin) and true triumph (Tyrion killing his father). And Arya headed to Bravos. Bran getting to the tree was hard to watch, but we've been waiting for this for ages.

The Rewatch Project: Season 4, Episode 9: The Watchers on the Wall

Recap

Sam and Jon head for watch atop the wall discussing Ygritte. Sam gets technical about what the Night's Watch vows mean, then he makes it clear Jon is no poet on his description of sex. Jon sends Sam to get some sleep.

An owl that is warged watches and brings a message to the wildlings and Torman tells his tale about his bear. Ygritte loses her temper and wants to think only of her arrows. The Thenn leader accuses Ygritte of letting Jon go, but she forbids anyone else from touching him, as Jon is hers to kill.

Sam and Aemon discuss wildlings. Aemon insists Sam loves Gilly. He tells Sam a story of a girl he loved, then sends Sam to bed.

Gilly arrives at the wall and Sam insists they let her in. He tells her from now on, wherever she goes, he will go. Two horns sound.

The warg says it's time and the wildlings south of the wall set out. At Castle Black the men prepare, Jon atop the wall sees the fire Mance had said was the sign. Alliser says Jon can say it. They should have sealed the tunnel.

Sam settles Gilly into a store cellar. She argues with him about leaving her, but he insists a man of the Night's Watch has to do his duty and he kisses her. He then promises he won't die.

Pip and Sam prepare to defend. Pip frets, but Sam talks him down.

Ygritte watches and reports back to the wildlings on numbers on the south side of the wall. The wildlings attack from both sides. Janos comes to the top of the wall insisting Alliser is needed below. Alliser leaves Janos in charge but Janos is a panicky, worthless leader, so Grenn tells him he is needed below and Jon takes command.

Pip frets about dying. Wildlings clime the walls. Alliser gives a good speech. The wildlings breech the southern wall and battle breaks out. On the other side, climbers start up the wall.

Battle rages. Janos panics and hides himself in the same cellar Gilly is in. Pip gets an arrow in the neck and Sam holds him as he dies.

A giant and mammoth begin pulling at the gate at the base of the wall. Jon sends Grenn and five recruits to hold the inner gate. He then calls for oil at the top of the wall.

Sam goes down to join the fighting and by fluke kills a Thenn. He asked Grenn for more men, but Grenn is on his mission and tells Sam he needs to go up and ask Jon.

At the top of the wall they drop burning oil. The mammoth below understandably panics and as he runs away, one of the giants gets hit in the back in what must be exactly the right spot and falls. The other giant howls with rage and begins to heave up the gate on his own.

Sam tells Jon Ser Alliser has fallen and he is needed below. Jon leaves Edd in charge.

Grenn and his men hold the gate, taking inspiration from the Night's Watch vows.

Jon sends Sam for Ghost and then roles into supreme fighting mode. He has a lengthy battle with the lead Then, then staggers to stand in front of Ygritte. He is unarmed and she aims at him but can't seem to shoot, then an arrow comes out her chest. Freaking Ollie. She dies in Jon's arms.

To the north side of the wall the climb up the wall continues. Edd calls for the scythe to be dropped and they are all knocked down, one short an arm. The wildlings retreat for the night.

Tormund is captured. Sam and Gilly reunite

Jon intends to find Mance to kill Mance. It's a bad plan, but there's no better one. On the way through the wall, Sam and Jon find Grenn and his men, along with the dead giant—they held the wall.

Jon leaves Sam with Longclaw and heads out north.


Review

The episode is strong, but it is all action. I realize I am probably in the minority on this, but I like a bit more pacing variety in episodes. Ygritte dying was beautiful and emotional. And Sam promising Gilly he's live was great. And Janos hiding with Gilly was it's own kind of great (funny, since Janos is so pathetic). There were feels related to both Pip and Grenn. I just like an episode that is not all one thing a bit better. Don't get me wrong. I gave it 92 out of 100—this is not BAD at all. Just not as strong as the last two, in my opinion.

The Rewatch Project: Season 4, Episode 8: The Mountain and the Viper

Recap

Men dig for treasure in Mole's Town. One of the whores harasses Gilly about her baby waking her. Gilly hears a signal and gives warning but the woman doesn't believe her. The village is attacked by wildlings. Nearly everyone is killed outright, though Ygritte finds Gilly and her baby hiding and just motions them to keep quiet.

Sam frets over the attack. The brothers argue over not being allowed to leave the castle to defend the area, but they are too few to lessen the number and still be able to put up a fight at the castle. Jon notes if they've hit Mole's Town, Castle Black is next. They talk numbers and Edd asks if the last of them alive will burn the others.

The Unsullied wash and bathe in a stream. Grey Worm sees Missendei and gazes at her admiringly. She and Dany discuss it, wondering what interest Unsullied would have with women. Grey Worm comes to Missendei later to apologize. He tells her her lessons in the common tongue are precious to him. She says she is sorry he was cut, but he is philosophical. He says had he not been he would never have been bought by Danaerys or met Missendei. She says she is glad he saw her.

Ramsay prepares Theon to take Moat Cailin. Theon goes in and tells them if they leave they will be allowed safe passage to the stony shore. They are sick and dying, but the Captain spurns him. In response one of his men kills him “to go home safely”. Of course Ramsay lied about that and they are all flayed...

Littlefinger is questioned by the Lords of the Vale who finally bring up a witness. The girl. “Alaine” comes out and admits she is Sansa Stark, noting she had met Lord Royce when he came north taking his son to the wall. She then admits Littlefinger told many lies—all to protect her. She weaves her tale of being saved and Lysa's jealousy that ends in suicide. They believe her. Littlefinger looks impressed.

Littlefinger then tells what he thinks should be done with Robin—taking him out to survey his lands and meet the Lords of the Vale. It is time for him to grow up.

A boy brings Ser Barristan a letter—a copy of Jorah's pardon. Barristan confronts Jorah, then Jorah comes before the queen. Dany is furious. He wants to talk alone, but she refuses and she banishes him.

Ramsay presents the flag of Moat Cailin to Roose. Roose points out the north and they discuss Locke and the Stark boys, then Roose presents Ramsay with a decree legitimizing him. Ramsay promises to be worthy and they ride for Winterfell.

Littlefinger asks Sansa why she backed him up. She says at least she knows what he wants.

Arya thought Joffrey's death would make her happy. The Hound thought poison was lame, but Arya says she would kill with anything. They reach the Bloody Gate and learns Lysa is dead. Arya laughs hysterically.

Robin is afraid to leave the Vale. Littlefinger gives a string of ways people die right in their homes. He tells him to take charge of his life. Sansa comes down the stairs with a die job and a dramatic dress.

Tyrion and Jaime discuss the Gods and their cousin Orson. Tyrion is brought out for the trial by combat. Oberyn kisses Ellaria and drinks wine. Ellaria is alarmed when she sees the Mountain. Pycelle gives a droning intro until a horn blows. Oberyn comes out with a spear. The Mountain stands with a sword. Oberyn tells who he is and why he intends to kill the Mountain, but first he wants to hear a confession and who gave the order. He keeps yelling “You raped her, you murdered her, you killed her children” as he dances around tiring the Mountain. The Mountain throws him around a bit breaks his spear but he gets another. Then Oberyn manages to hamstring the Mountain and stabs a spear through his middle, still demanding the confession. He looks up at the audience as he talks and the Mountain knocks his feet out from under him, then breaks his teeth, confesses, and crushes Oberyn's skull. Tywin sentences Tyrion to death.

RIP Oberyn, you sexy beast

Review

I love this episode. In fact thus far it barely behind episode 1.9 for the best episode of all. The are two in season 6 that might pass it, but seriously, I bet it is in my top 5 ever. There is everything to love. Or maybe it is that the normal stuff was normal (raid on Mole's town was probably the worst scene, but it wasn't bad and it had the feature I liked of Ygritte letting Gilly go). The Orson/beetle bit was weird, but I liked the rest of that—I always like Tyrion and Jaime. The Castle Black scene is made awesome by Edd. Loved Arya. But the two homeruns are Sansa selling her story to the Lords of the Vale and EVERYTHING about Oberyn. That fight scene had excellent subtle details, too—Jaime and Cersei and their opposite responses at each turn in the fight was brilliant—sort of an opposites mirror going on.

The Rewatch Project: Season 4, Episode 6: First of His Name

Recap

Davos and Stannis visit the Iron Bank of Bravos. They are kept waiting and the beginning doesn't go well, but in the end Davos convinces them Stannis is the man to bet on for paying them back as King of Westeros. Davos finds Salidor Saan at a brothel and gives him money for his assistance with Stannis.

Yara leads a troop of me for a rescue of Theon as Ramsay and Miranda have a romp. The Iron Born arrive and use grappling hooks to storm the Dreadfort. They find Theon in the kennels but Theon is too far gone—confused and sure it is a trick of Ramsay's. As Yara tries to drag Theon out, Ramsay and some men arrive for a fight, then Yara and her men flee as Ramsay releases the hounds.

Ramsay gives Reek a reward—a bath. Ramsay helps, kindly, which is more terrifying than torture, then Ramsay tells Reek he needs his help, but he will need to play a role—pretend to be Theon Greyjoy.

A goat herder and his flock are accosted by a dragon and several goats are burned. Dany holds court and she promises to pay the herder three times their worth. Hizdhar then comes telling of his old proud family. Turns out his father was one of the slavers crucified. He asks to bury his father. Dany defends her actions, then allows him to bury his father.

Oberyn complains of the early hour for the small council meeting. Tywin begins. They determine a price on the Hound's head—one hundred silver stags. Varys gives a report on Danaerys. Cersei dismisses every detail about her. Tywin says she must be dealt with and has Mace Tyrell fetch quill and paper.

Oberyn and Varys speak in front of the Iron Throne. They speak of Oberyn's travels and Oberyn asks Varys about his story, sexuality and ambition.

Jaime visits Tyrion. It's time for the trial. Tyrion is led in and chained. Tommen recuses himself. Tywin asks if Tyrion killed Joffrey. He says no. Tywin asks if Sansa did. Tyrion says not that he knows of. Ser Meryn tells of Tyrion's threats and namecalling of Joffrey. Pycelle tells of the poisons stolen from his stores and the poison used to kill Joffrey, traces of which were found in the necklace Sansa wore at the wedding. Cersei testifies about Tyrion threatening that her joy would turn to ashes in her mouth, and then Varys tells of the threat Tyrion made at the small council meeting. Tywin calls for a recess.

Jaime confronts Tywin about the farce they are putting on, then offers to take up his role as heir if Tyrion can live. They reach an agreement. Jaime tells Tyrion the plan and the trial resumes.

Shae is called as a witness and gives a terrible spin to everything that happened between them, then lies and says Tyrion and Sansa plotted Joffrey's murder together. Tyrion says he wishes to confess, then gives a brilliant speech about wishing he'd killed Joffrey and wishing he'd let Stannis sack King's Landing. He then says he'll get no justice there and demands a trial by combat.



Review

I really like this episode. Dany's position and the weight of dragons in society weigh heavily. Oberyn's charm is on display when he questions Cersei about Tyrion's threat. And Tyrion's speech at this farce of a trial is one of my favorite scenes of the series. I even liked Tywin playing Jaime so skillfully. The only read detractor was the travesty that never should have happened. Yara's rescue attempt was just stupid. They all had weapons—running when the dog cage is opened? Yeahno. I guess it was so Ramsay would have something to reward Reek over, but that scene really is terrible. So one of the best scenes and one of the worst. I suppose at least they ended on a high note.

The Rewatch Project: Season 4, Episode 2: The Lion and the Rose

Recap 

Ramsey and Miranda hunt Tansy with Reek hobbling along behind.

Tyrion and Jaime share a meal. Or rather Tyrion eats and Jaime mopes. He says he can't fight left handed. Tyrion says he needs a discreet sparring partner and he has just the one. Jaime and Bronn are then seen sparring, Bronn using dirty tricks to get across what a one-handed man might need to stay alive.

Roose arrives at Winterfell with his new bride. Ramsey and Locke bond over their mutual sadism. Ramsey brings Reek to Roose who is angry over the flaying. Theon admits to Roose he didn't kill the Stark boys, then as he is shaving Ramsey, learns Roose killed Robb. Because all the names have to start with R. Roose sends Locke to find the boys and suggests starting with Jon at Castle Black. He then sends Ramsey and Theon to take back Moat Cailin.

Varys warns Tyrion that Shae has been noticed.

Mace Tyrell gives Joffrey a wedding cup. Cersei points Shae out to Tywin. Tyrion gives Joffrey a book all kings should read. Joffrey is surprisingly gracious. Tywin gives Joffrey a Valyrian Steel sword. Joffrey uses it to cut the book, then asks for help from the crowd to name it. They settle on Widow's Wail.

Tyrion ends things with Shae—she is particularly obstinate so he has to be mean about it. He then sends her with Bronn to get on a ship.

Lady Melisadre burns Selyse's brother as a sacrifice. Selyse is giddy about it, swearing she sees their souls freed to the Lord of Light. Ser Davos criticizes but Stannis insists they were infidels. At dinner Selyse tells of the siege at Storm's End and Melisandre shares of her childhood hunger. Selyse frets over Shireen and wants to beat her, but Stannis says no. They compromise by sending Melisandre to talk to her. Shireen was upset about the burning of her uncle. They discuss religion. Mel claims the only hell is the one we are living in.

Summer hunts and then Hodor wakes Bram. Jojen warns of spending too much time in Summer's skin. They find a weirwood and Bran asks to go to it. He sees a string of visions including where they need to go.

Margaery walks the aisle, takes Joffrey's arm, then he cloaks her, the septon binds their wrists, and they kiss.

Outside at the giant reception party Lady Olenna and Tywin discuss extravagance and money. The camera pans it all. Bronn assures Tyrion Shae got on a ship. Olenna adjusts Sansa's necklace and gives sympathy about Robb's death. She invites Sansa to High Garden, then excuses herself. Musicians play. Joffrey throws coins. Margaery suggests it's time for the announcement, so Joffrey announces HER and she announces the leftover food will go to feed the poor.

Loras and Jaime discuss Loras's pending marriage to Cersei. Jaime warns him off of it. Cersei stops Brienne to thank her for returning Jaime, then calls her on being in love with him. Cersei then demands Pycelle make sure the extra food goes to the hounds, not the poor. Dontos juggles. Cersei and Tywin talk to Oberyn and Ellaria. Cersei comments on “Sands” but Oberyn gets the better of her, reminding her she should be glad Dorne is different from King's Landing and finds rape and the murder of children distasteful.

Joffrey calls for the Historical Reenactment of the War of Five Kings. As played by dwarfs. Through the performance most everybody is offended at some point. Sansa looks devastated. Even Margaery looks disgusted. Joffrey holds the purse but then suggests Tyrion spar with them. Tyrion makes a joke of it but Joffrey takes offense. He comes over and pours wine on Tyrions head. Tyrion says it is good—too bad it spilled. The interaction keeps escalating with Tyrion offering repeated chances for Joffrey to walk away with dignity, but Joffrey keeps upping the ante, finally forcing Tyrion to act as his cup bearer. Tyrion fills his goblet then Joffrey sets it aside and cuts the pie.

Doves fly out. A piece is brought for Joffrey and Margaery. Tyrion and Sansa try to leave but Joffrey insists they stay, then Joffrey drinks. And coughs. He is choking. Jaime and Cersei run for him. Ser Dontos tells Sansa it is time to leave. Joffrey points at Tyrion as he dies. Cersei calls to seize Tyrion.


Review

I loved all the wedding-related stuff of this episode. A lot. And most of the other stuff was fine, too. But there are two scenes in this episode that bug me quite a lot. I hated the Ramsey hunting Tansy bit. I would rather have heard that as a story, I think. I mean I get it. But it's hard to watch. And then I had Melisandre burning Axyl Florent. That one I am more convinced we needed to see, but I still didn't like it. Everything about the wedding though, was SO top notch that the couple things that bugged me don't take down my overall rating of the episode all that much.

Season 6, Episode 10: Winds of Winter: Recap and Review

Recap

Bells toll. People are dressed (nobody seems able to dress him or herself except the High Sparrow). People feed into the Sept of Baelor as Loras shivers and prays. The seven septons sit. Pycelle fails to pay his whore. A little bird passes a message to Pycelle and Loras is brought in for his trial. Loras confesses guilt to everything. He kneels before the mother and repents, giving up his lands and titles and committing to the faith. Then they give him that bad forehead tattoo.

Tommen goes to leave and the Mountain blocks him. Margaery asks why the High Sparrow mutilated Loras and where Cersei is. The High Sparrow sends Lancel for her, but Lancel spots one of the little birds, so sends the others for Cersei and follows the little bird down under the sept. Pycelle wonders where the King is, but all he finds is Qyburn. Qyburn’s birds attack. Lancel keeps following. And gets stabbed for his efforts, then left down in the tunnels. Margaery smells a rat as Lancel spots the barrels. There are candles ahead and he crawls toward them. Margaery warns the High Sparrow but he won’t hear here. Candles melt, bringing the flame ever near the pools of wildfyre they sit in. The Faith Militant blocks people from leaving. And wildfyre levels the place… Cersei smiles. Tommen watches in horror.

Cersei pours wine on Septa Unella telling her to confess. The Septa is tied to a table. Cersei confesses pretty much everything to her, telling her it felt good. The Septa welcomes death but it isn’t death Cersei has in mind, at least not yet. She calls in Ser Gregor. He takes off his helmet and Cersei leaves Septa Unella to him.

Tommen gets the news and proceeds to jump out his window.

Walder Frey raises a toast to houses Lannister and Frey. Jaime seems to have indigestion. Bronn admires girls, though he seems disgusted that all the girls want Jaime. Jaime calls over two girls to attend to Bronn. Walder sits down and gloats. He says Edmure is back in a cell. Jaime asks about Walder’s history fighting. Frey says he has defeated his enemies. He draws parallels with Jaime and Jaime looks disgusted. Jaime points out that it is the Lannisters people fear. And that if they have to ride north every time the Freys lose Riverrun, why do they need the Freys? Walder looks confused.

Qyburn shows Cersei Tommen’s body. There is no sept for his funeral. Cersei says to burn him and bury his ashes where the sept was, as that is where his family is.

Sam and Gilly arrive at Old Town. The white ravens are all being sent out en masse. At the Citadel they seem to be backed up on information. They still have Mormont listed as Lord Commander at the Knight’s Watch and Maester Aemon as the Maester. Sam is told the arch master will discuss the irregularities with Sam but in the meantime he can use the library. Gilly and baby Sam cannot—no women or children. And… LIBRARY!!!

A white raven flies toward Winterfell. Jon tells Melisandre about his history in the great hall and she reminds him he was lucky to have a family and feasts. Davos comes in and tosses the stag to Melisandre then demands she tell Jon who it belonged to and what she did to her. She admits to burning her. Davos asks why. She claims it was the only way and that her father and mother killed her, too. Davos points out they are all dead. She says she was wrong and he asks how many died because she was wrong. He asks for leave to execute her. Jon asks what she has to say. She says she has been ready to die for years but the great war is coming and the army of the dead with it. She says she can help win that war. Jon tells her to ride south. If she returns north he will hang her as a murderer. Davos says he will execute her himself if she comes back this way.

Jon tells Sansa he’s having the Lord’s Chambers prepared for her. She says he should take it, but he credits her for saving them. He asks if she trusts Lord Baelish and she says no. She apologizes for not telling Jon. He says they need to trust each other—they have so many enemies. She tells him a raven came—winter is here. They both smile. Winter is the time for wolves.

Lady Tyrell, all in black, meets with Ellaria and the Sand Snakes. She tartly shuts the Sand Snakes up and says the grown ups will talk. Ellaria suggests they need each other for survival, but Lady Olenna is not after survival. Ellaria acknowledges that it is vengeance they will get. Varys comes out and says “fire and blood”.

Dany tells Daario he’s not invited to Westeros—that she can’t take a “mistress”. She makes it a command—that the second sons will keep the peace. He pretty much begs, but she shuts him down.

Dany and Tyrion anticipate heading to Westeros. Dany admits she felt nothing telling Daario to go and that is what scares her—she is just eager to get on with it. Tyrion says people have been telling him to believe in things his whole life but he saw where belief got them. He made a life of cynicism, but he believes in her. He says he’d swear his sword to her, but he doesn’t have one. She has had something made for him… she pins the hand on his chest and names him hand. He kneels before her.

Walder sits alone in his hall as a serving girl brings him pie. He asks for his sons, Black Walder and Lothar. The girl says they are here. She points to the pie. He peels back the crust and the girl says they weren’t easy to carve, especially Black Walder. She peels her face and Arya introduces herself, telling him she wanted the last thing he saw to be a Stark face, smiling down at him while he died. She slits his throat.

Sansa sits in the Godswood. Littlefinger interrupts. She asks what he wants. He says he thought she knew, but she thought she did but she was wrong. He says she wasn’t then tells her of his image of him on the iron throne with her by his side. He tries to kiss her but she stops him and says it’s a pretty picture and walks away. He tells her word will reach the south that he has declared for House Stark. She reminds him he has declared for houses before, always serving himself. He says she is the future of House Stark and plants the seed she deserves it more than Jon.

Benjen notes the magic in the wall that will not let him through, so he leaves off Meera and Bran at a heart tree with no mode of transportation. He will keep fighting as long as he can. Bran touches the tree for the last images he needs… or something… He ends up at the Tower of Joy and follows youngish Ned up to Lyanna in her bed of blood (but no roses). She is dying. She whispers and what I got is “if Robert finds out, he’ll kill him. You have to protect him”

Screen cuts to Jon… Bronze Yohn Royce grumbles about not fighting for wildlings and somebody suggests going home, but Jon lays out the reality of the real enemy. Lady Lyanna brings out a can of whoop-ass for all the houses who failed the call and then says House Mormont remembers and calls Jon king. The Houses stand one by one pledging to Jon. Littlefinger looks like he has something stuck in his craw. Sansa smiles at times, but also looks unsure… Littlefinger’s seeds of doubt are taking root.

Jaime and Bronn reach a burning King’s Landing. Cersei takes the Iron Throne and Qyburn crowns her. Nobody we recognize is in the audience. Jaime watches from the side, confused look on his face.

Mad Queen Cersei

Oh, the ships… Kraken sails and dragon heads… dragon sails… hundreds of them… Horses, dothraki, dragons…


Review

Anybody notice Loras had more hair in that opening sequence than at any other time this season?

The decision for all those little birds to kill Pycelle was definitely creepy, but also a little odd. Making killers of children is very disturbing. The decisions though on the wildfyre—Lancel following a little bird and being there to see it (so we could) but incapacitated so unable to stop it—all of that was done beautifully. I can’t believe though, that they wiped out the entire Tyrell family, other than Lady Olenna. Holy cow! I mean I think most of us guessed, but I somehow thought SOMEBODY would get away.

Leaving Septa Unella to Gregor *shivers* I’m glad they didn’t show this—we all know what he is capable of. I’m surprised Qyburn didn’t get her, but the show hasn’t built on his need for women for his experiments.

And holy crap, Tommen! Fly little bird, fly! *splat*

When Walder says he couldn’t go killing his son by law because it would give his family a bad name, Jaime’s look is priceless… Reminds me of the books where Manderly says it was a mercy the Frey boys died, because if they hadn’t, they would have grown up Frey.

Loved Jaime’s tone with Walder. Man Walder is smug. What a horrible ass. Jaime also seeming disgusted really helps with not being too pissed at Jaime for being there at all.

Man, Cersei is COLD regarding Tommen’s death. No bells. Apparently no funeral.

Anybody else have a library-gasm? OHMYGAWD. It was spectacular!!! Gilly and baby Sam are going to be waiting a long time because Sam is going to lose himself in there.

Melisandre banished. CALLED IT! I figured she still has story ahead, but Jon couldn’t very well keep her there. Liam Cunningham was terrific in this scene. Lots of feels with him talking about Shireen.

Loved Jon acknowledging Sansa saved them and Sansa knowing she should have told Jon. This scene where they welcome winter is a nice moment of unity.

Lady Olenna shutting down the Sand Snakes was a beautiful thing. And VARYS! So Dany will have not just the Iron Islands but also Dorne and the Reach… And with no Baratheons left… probably the Storm Lands, too…

I was surprised Daario actually used the word love… seems sort of soft for him. Begging, even. This had to happen, and the part of me with a crush on Michiel Huisman is glad he didn’t betray her.

Naming Tyrion hand made me cry—someone truly acknowledging his wisdom as an advisor—recognizing his worth… beautiful. These two are great together. They both get a lot wrong on their own, but together they seem to hit it just right. I think maybe Tyrion has never knelt before. I can’t wait to see them learn they are actually brother and sister (I know… just a theory… still…)

While the time travel bit is annoying, I LOVED Arya’s kill—Black Walder and Lothar in pies and telling Walder it was her before killing him. They Frey house is going to be a messs, killing each other for the right to be heir. Also, Arya was engaged to a Frey—that was part of the deal Robb made to cross the bridge… guess this means the engagement is off…

Oh, Littlefinger, you evil bastard, you. Jon and Sansa were united and you just may have ruined it… I’m glad Sansa refused the kiss and walked away, but that conversation is going to have repercussions.

So… not sure why Benjen didn’t leave the horse with Meera and Bran—surely it is easier for him to get another one than for those two to get the rest of the way to the wall, but whatever… The rest of the Tower of Joy was good. I would have liked ALL of what Lyanna whispered, but with: “if Robert finds out, he’ll kill him. You have to protect him” we get 1) BOY baby, and 2) ONE baby and 3) Robert would kill him (aka: not Robert’s baby, probably a Targaryen)… and then the transition to Jon… seems pretty obvious to me.

Man, I love Lady Mormont… What a badass little girl. I’m a little disappointed Jon didn’t point out that it was Sansa who won and Sansa who should be queen, but these things do seem to take on a life of their own. I liked Manderly calling Jon the White Wolf.

Couldn’t they find ANYBODY with more legitimacy than Qyburn to crown Cersei? I guess with all the septons dead… and all the nobility, because they were at the trial… sheesh… Mad Cersei, queen of the small folk? And man… Jaime throwing shade… I’ve thought the Valonqar in the books would be a complicated, elegant twist, but this looks a whole bunch like Jaime is going to do the deed.

And Dany and company are on their way back to Westeros…


So to sum up…

Dany has the Iron Islands, Dorne, the Reach, possibly the Stormlands.

The Starks have the North, The Vale.

Cersei has the West and the Riverlands. But how long will she have the Riverlands with no Frey to hold it.

Now everybody hates Cersei, that much is clear, but Dany and the Starks could feasibly make common cause… the Starks will need her… and in fact Theon being with her—he owes the Starks some atonement, eh? And Tyrion can help pave the WHY for the Starks being key in Robert’s rebellion—Aerys II DID burn Rickon and set it up so Brandon was strangled… And Jon is Targaryen AND Stark… I think these two can work together.

Several houses have been demolished: Lannister has only Cersei and Jaime, Tyrell has only Olenna, Baratheon is done, Martell is done, Tully has only Edmure, Arryn has only Robin. Stark family is actually looking pretty good with four living children…

So is this the death of nobility? Once upon a time it seemed absurd to think of someone like Littlefinger taking the throne, but if all the great houses are wiped out… And who is going to inherit House Frey?

And so much for the season ending with the wall falling… didn’t happen. Yet.


So in the next week or so, I plan on making book predicitions based on the show, meaning I will discuss where I think the books have been spoiled, versus what I think will happen differently. Depending on how much there is, it may be two posts… so watch for that!

What did all of you think?

Season 6. Episode 9: Battle of the Bastards: Recap and Review

Recap

Daario leads the Dothraki screamers

We open to fireballs catapulted at Meereen. Tyrion attempts to update Dany but he sounds like a ninny. Dany has a plan, but it sounds an awful lot like Aerys “burn them all” plan… Tyrion suggests an alternative. They meet with the representative masters to discuss terms of surrender. The masters give terms but Dany points out it is THEIR surrender they are discussing. Drogon arrives and Dany climbs on board. Rhaegal and Viserion break out, and the Dothaki arrive at the gates to kill some Harpy… Ships burn and Grey Worm explains to the soldiers that they can serve masters who will never serve them, or go home to their families. They flee. Tyrion then explains one of the masters must die. Two push the third forward saying he is low born. He drops to a knee to plead and Grey Worm cuts the throats of the two still standing. Tyrion then tells the third to go back and tell the people what happens when the masters rebel against the Queen.

Parlay parties for the Starks and Boltons meet. Ramsay is his glib, charming, psychotic self. He thanks Jon for returning his wife and asks for surrender. Jon offers instead to settle this with single combat. Ramsay laughs, refusing, since he might lose single combat but knows his army will defeat Jon’s. Ramsay asks if they will let their brother die then pulls out Shaggy Dog’s head to prove they have him.

Back in the tent they discuss tactics. Jon uses a lot of vocabulary that Tormund has not clue about. They discuss patience and letting the Bolton Army come at them from the front, as the ditches will keep them from getting surrounded. When the others leave Sansa scolds Jon, since she is the one who knows Ramsay. She warns that he is more cruel than Jon can imagine. That Ramsay won’t fall into a trap—he lays traps. She admits they will never get Rickon back. Rickon has a better claim than Jon or Sansa, so Ramsay can’t let him live. They argue about men, Sansa insisting they should have waited for more, Jon pointing out no one else would help—this is what they have. Sansa says if Ramsay wins, she will not go back to Winterfell alive.

Tormund and Davos discuss the pending battle and the kings they believed in. Mance and Stannis are gone. Tormund invites Davos for a delicious round of fermented goat's milk, but Davos wants to walk—says it clears his head before a battle. Unfortunately, his wandering brings him to Shireen’s pyre, identified by the partially burned stag he carved for her.

Jon asks if Melisandre has advice, but all she says is “don’t lose”. He says if he falls not to bring him back. She argues that she has no choice—the Lord of Light gives her the power if he wills it.

Theon and Yara stand before Dany and Tyrion. Tyrion questions Theon pretty sharply. It goes rather poorly for the Greyjoys until Theon says it is Yara’s claim they are there for, not his. Dany and Yara bond over this and discuss what it is they want and that Euron wants to make the same offer, but with a marriage required to seal the deal—that he would kill Dany as soon as he has the Seven Kingdoms. Dany agrees to give them rule of the Iron Islands provided they are also part of Westeros and they cease the reaving, raping, and pillaging of the rest of Westeros. Yara says it is all they know, but it is a condition Dany won’t budge on. They shake on it.

Armies in the north form up, the rag tag mixed army of Jon’s and the uniform army of the Boltons, Umbers and Karstarks. There are burned crosses between them—flayed men—who knows who they are? Ramsay leads Rickon on a rope, frees him, then tells him to run. Jon rides for him as Rickon runs and Ramsay begins shooting arrows at him. One finally gets him and Jon charges as Tormund wills him not to. But then they all charge.

Battle battle battle. Jon kills oodles of people. Bodies pile up. Battle battle, GIANT ACTION! And suddenly they are surrounded by Bolton shields and spears coming at them. The Boltons push in, making the space narrower and narrower. Jon gets trampled under dead bodies and more and more people keep getting piled on him. He struggles and finally claws his way up from under. And finally the war horns sound and the Vale has arrived!!!! Littlefinger sits next to Sansa as she smirks, having saved the day. The Vale demolishes the Bolton army. Jon goes after Ramsay who flees.

Ramsay makes it back to Winterfell and shuts the gates, but they are no match for Wun Wun. He is filled with arrows but has let in Jon’s army. Ramsay shoots Wun Wun in the eye and “accepts single combat” with Jon. Jon gets a shield up to catch the arrows as he comes at Ramsay, then he bashes him good. The Stark flag is hung from Winterfell.

Davos throws Melisandre shade, Jon tells the men to bury Rickon in the crypts next to Ned, Sansa asks where Ramsay is.

So satisfying

She goes to see him. He claims she can’t kill him because he is part of her. She says his words, his house, his name and all memory of him will disappear. The dog kennels begin to ease open… Seems he shouldn’t have let the information about starving his dogs out… he claims they are loyal. She claims they are starving. She has the right of it. They eat him and she smiles.


Review

Loved how things went down in Meereen—the dragons burning ships, the Dothraki killing Harpies. The meeting with the masters was great—I particularly loved how the decision as to which to kill went.

I wanted to ring Ramsay’s neck, but that is normal. So smug. But also so typically Ramsay. There was also a bit of an echo here—this offer to end this with single combat is what Jaime did to Robb back in season 2. Now Robb and Ramsay have very few things in common, and it isn’t clear how much Jaime and Jon have in common, but it does seem like a smart choice, when the leader with the bigger army is offered this choice by someone who is rumored to be a superior fighter, that letting the battle happen is smarter. I liked Sansa’s contribution at the end—telling Ramsay he would die.

It was funny watching Tormund not knowing the battle terms in a way, but at the same time really brought out how different the wildlings are in their training—I worried that miscommunication might come into play since the training is so different.

Sansa and Jon’s argument seemed realistic to me. Both were right and both were wrong, as is so often the case. Sansa DOES know Ramsay better, and while Ramsay is only a pink little man and not a white walker, he is also more cunning than anything Jon has faced. Jon, however, is right, at least given the information he has, that their army is not going to grow. Best get on with it, as their situation is rougher than that of people sitting comfy in a castle.

Really loved Tormund and Davos and their discussion of kings. I liked Davos recognizing Stannis as his own worst enemy and liked the bit of ironic foreshadowing of Jon not being a king… because of course he is who has a right to it…

Tyrion dressing down Theon was sure a mixed bag of emotion… remember what a dick Theon was? He totally deserved that, but he’s been through so much and changed so much that it was still hard to watch him have to take it. I adored the Dany/Yara interaction… two queens seeing common cause.

As hard as this Rickon scene was to watch and as totally gripped as I was, this also reminded me of the Holy Grail and running at that castle when the castle just never seems to get any closer. Also… Rickon… arrows… bob, weave, roll. Make yourself a more difficult target, dammit… make sure if you get hit, it is somewhere less lethal. Guard the heart and head, man… But seriously—so sad. And Jon totally fell into Ramsay’s trap—completely… Because Ramsay did it just right—the lethal arrow when hope was so close--by design, I believe--he wanted Jon to hope first, as that would have maximum impact.

Battle questions
* Why do none of Jon’s men have shields? They seem handy in defense of arrows.
* Where is Ghost? (though I guess he probably would have died—too obvious a target in the open like this—so maybe this was better)
* Notice Jon in the fray and Ramsay sitting back behind the battle lines not actually doing a damn thing, though his battle commands are pretty effective. Did you notice the arrows were strategically fired to build up that wall of bodies?
* Why did nobody sneak around behind the lines and murder Ramsay? (Ghost even)
* Why does nobody roll under those spears to cut off Bolton feet?
* Why does no one sneak between spears and then pull shields down from the top… a coordinated effort at this would have helped a lot.

Man, it was good of the Vale to show up. Such a relief. And dammit Sansa deserved that damn smirk. She called it—they needed more men and she delivered. And of course Ramsay, having done nothing but command and shooting arrows at Rickon, never in a speck of danger, flees. The coward. And thank goodness for Wun Wun. Though that also was the very saddest moment for me, Wun Wun dying after how much he had helped. Also loved Jon getting the better of Ramsay, but I was very glad Sansa got to deliver the final blow. Erm… bite…

I found this episode really satisfying. I loved this end for Meereen, probably compounded by being glad to be at the end of Meereen. And I didn't want Rickon or Wun Wun to die, but I sort of expected those. I am just really glad it wasn't Tormund or Davos. A lot of people are saying best episode of the season or ever, and I am not quite there. I tend to like but not love battles. I like the interpersonal stuff more, so episode 4 with the Jon/Sansa reunion or The Door are probably my favorites of the season, but this was still very good.

So what did all of you think?

Season 6, Episode 8: No One: Recap and Review

Recap

First mothering Arya has received in years

Lady Crane has added Arya's suggested anger at the end of her speech. When she gets back to her dressing room she finds Arya and helps patch her up. She apparently has some experience with patching up knife holes. Lady Crane invites her to Pentos but Arya says nobody will be safe with her. She is given milk of the poppy as she needs sleep to heal.

The Hound finds some of the Brotherhood and slaughters them in vengeance for the village. 

Meereen seems to have found some order. A Red Priestess preaches how Dany saved them. Tyrion is proud, Varys skeptical. Varys is leaving for friends in Westeros and Tyrion will miss him.

Qyburn lets Cersei know several members of the faith are there to see her. The king allowed them in. Cersei goes to meet them. The High Sparrow wants to see her at the High Sept but she refuses and “chooses violence”. The Mountain kills the faith militant guy who attacks him.

Brienne and Pod look down on Jaime's siege. Brienne asks the men to speak with Ser Jaime Lannister. Bronn nabs Pod and teaches him a few tricks about dirty fighting, pondering what Jaime and Brienne are up to—he points out the mutual attraction between Jaime and Brienne. Jaime is surprised Brienne found Sansa. He points out Cersei still wants Sansa for Joffrey's murder. The two bicker about Tully's, castles, and politics. Brienne calls on him to be honorable and convinces him to let her try to convince the Blackfish to give up the castle to go north to fight for Sansa. They make a deal. She tries to give Oathkeeper back, but Jaime says it's hers. She admits if she fails and he attacks, that honor compels her to fight with Sansa's kin.

Oh, come on, you stubborn old goat...

The Blackfish is not yielding. He doesn't want to hear the plea and even if Brienne finally convinces him to read the letter and note Sansa is exactly like Catelyn, he still refuses. Brienne sends a note back to Sansa that she failed. 

Cersei enters the full throne room but is denied access to stand beside Tommen. The other ladies of the court act like she is contagious. Tommen announces that Trial By Combat is no longer a thing... Qyburn tells Cersei the rumor he investigated is much more than that.

Tyrion is smug, plying Greyworm and Missendei with wine. He dreams of having his own vinyard one day. He tries to convince them to tell jokes, but it goes rather poorly, though Missendei is giggly with wine when they hear the bells that they are under attack. The masters have come for their property.

Straight from the books (but easier to read as Jaime is bluffing)

Jaime talks to Edmure, promising to let him see his family. Edmure is skeptical, asking how Jaime lives with himself. The two discuss their sisters and the love the two had for their children. Jaime makes threats for what he will do if he must to get back to Cersei. But then we see Edmure approach Riverrun and demand entry. The Blackfish commands they refuse, but the men let him in because he is the lord. He then yields the castle to Jaime. His men obey but are clearly disappointed.

The Blackfish helps Brienne and Pod flee, but stays to fight. Jaime waves as Brienne and Pod sail off.

The slavers are firing flame into Meereen. So much for Tyrion's peace. Greyworm says the pyramid is the only defensible place, so they will wait. A noise alerts them of something... Dany is back...

The Hound finds the REAL Brotherhood hanging the violent pretenders. They have a common mission. They bicker but agree The Hound can kill two of them, but not by ax. He knocks the block out from under two. He then takes Lem's boots. The Brotherhood tries to convince him to join them. They remind him how it went when he walked away from the fighting.

Lady Crane checks on Arya then stands on a chair to get some potion and somebody comes in. It is the waif, who kills her. Arya is awoken, sees her, then leaps off the balcony to escape the waif. There is a long tense chase involving a lot of falling, jumping and bleeding. Many market goods are knocked about and a bathhouse is trespassed upon. Arya makes her way to a room and the waif asks on her knees or on her feet. Arya stands with Needle and slices off the candle.

Arya is going home!!!!

Jaqen follows the blood in the House of Black and White, past the pool, down the stairs, and to the Hall of Faces where he finds the dripping face of the waif. Arya holds Needle to Jaqen. He says, “Finally a girl is No One.” Arya says “A girl is Arya Stark of Winterfell, and I am going home.” He looks pleased.


Review 

Lady Crane inviting Arya to come be the new actress is a nice book nod—in the books Arya plays the Sansa character in the play as the actress did who has disappeared.

Varys can't go off on a secret mission in the company of the most famous dwarf in the city... Tyrion corrects the world. I just like the meta-moment here—Peter Dinklage is probably the most famous dwarf in the world... Man I hope Varys is off to meet his book plot.

I adore the dynamic between Jaime and Brienne—so much sexual tension. He admires her, even if he feels compelled to play Lannister loyalist.

Cersei is devastated by Tommen's ruling, betrayed by her son.

While it is frustrating to watch Edmure play into Jaime's hands, it is exactly how the book plot goes (less Brienne). It is all good for Jaime, and it is spot on for both Edmure and Blackfish's characters. I just wish Edmure had a spine.

Missendei and Greyworm are the exceptions that prove the rule about Tyrion making scenes fabulous. These scenes have been a bit painful. I'm not sure why the writers can't manage more here. To top it off, Tyrion's plan has backfired. But at least at the end Dany is back.

I really liked the Hound's interactions with the real Brotherhood. There was a bit of put down banter, but actual respect underneath. And I feel like The Hound is leaning toward joining them—maybe he will be the person to set the Brotherhood onto the Frey/Lannister punishment.

I've seen a lot of people really disappointed with this Arya sequence. A lot of far out speculation as to what was going on raised expectations, but I really felt like the show was never going to go that far outside the box anyway. This went exactly the way I thought it might. I was sad Lady Crane was killed, but it made sense and while some feel cheated at not seeing the actual fight, I thought slicing off the candle was fitting, and they could hardly do that AND show us the fight. And then I really liked that final Arya Jaqen scene.

Overall I've seen a lot of grumbling about how bad this episode was and I just didn't think so. If it had been in season 5 it would have been one of the best. This season has just kept the bar so high. And next week should be epic. So what did you think?

Season 6, Episode 7: The Broken Man: Recap and Review

Recap

At a camp of poor faithful people productively work together with the little they have. It looks like they may be building a simple sept. And then we spot an enormous man carrying a log by himself... The HOUND! The Elder Brother talks to him some and we learn how the Hound was found and saved. He claims God has work left for Sandor Clegane. They discuss faith and the Elder Brother claims he doesn't know this god from that, but what matters is there is some greater power that has plans.

 Margaery reads from the Seven Pointed Star. The High Sparrow asks her why she hasn't returned to the marriage bed. She claims to no longer have those base desires but he reminds her of duty and the need for an heir. She promises to try and then he threatens her grandmother.

Septa Unella hovers as Margaery and her grandmother talk. Her grandmother is unhappy and huffing and puffing. Margaery tries to calm her. Margaery talks the talk and tries to convince her grandmother Loras can be free if he repents. She tells her grandmother she must leave and slips a note in her hands. Outside Lady Olenna sees it is a rose. Margaery is still herself. Just playing the game.

The Wildlings grumble and posture about helping Jon, as this wasn't their plan, but he convinces them if they want help against the dead, they need to help Jon now, so he is in a position to return the favor later. Wun Wun stands and says Snow, and the others agree.

Cersei comes to see Lady Olenna. She's heard she is leaving King's Landing, but not without blaming Cersei for all this crap first. Cersei claims they need each other. Says things to coerce Olenna to stay, but Olenna has no patience for Cersei.

Jaime and Bronn approach Riverrun. Jaime tells Bronn he will be his right hand. Bronn is put out with all the fighting and the payoff still has not come. They march into the Frey “siege” which is a pathetic thing. The Freys are threatening to hang Lord Edmure, then stick a knife to his throat. The Blackfish calls their bluff and of course they can't—he is the only leverage they have. Jaime lectures Lothar Frey about not keeping a perimeter. 8000 men have just marched through it. He commands Lord Edmure be bathed and fed. He says he is taking over command of the siege. Bronn orders them to dig trenches and set pickets. The Frey's bristle and try to claim dominion, but the king has demanded Jaime take the castle. Jaime then asks Bronn to get word to the Blackfish that Jaime wants a parlay.

Sansa, Jon and Davos arrive to present their case to Lady Mormont, who is all of eleven. Sansa points out she is named for her Aunt Lyanna, a great beauty. She is sure Lady Momont will be too. Lady Mormont doubts it. Her mother was no beauty, but she was a great warrior who died fighting for Robb. Jon says he served under Lord Commander Mormont at Castle Black. She cuts off the small talk and asks why they are there. Jon asks for House Mormont's allegiance. Lady Lyanna points out Jon is a Snow and Lady Sansa is a Bolton or a Lannister. She says she is responsible for the lives of the people on Bear Island and asks why she should sacrifice one more life for somebody else's war. Lord Davos steps forward. He explains that if the houses are squabbling they will not be able to stand against the Dead—the real war—all of their war. Lyanna promises this is not the day the Mormonts desert the Starks. She has 62 men.

Jaime rides in for his parley with the Blackfish. The Blackfish says he assumed Jaime was there to fulfill the oath Jaime made Catelyn, but he doesn't see Sansa or Arya. He then asks if Jaime wishes to resume his captivity. Jaime doesn't. He insists the war is over and the castle belongs to the Freys, but the Blackfish insists as long as he is living, the war is not over. Jaime asks why he met then, and the Blackfish said “sieges are dull and I wanted to get the measure of you. And now I have. I'm disappointed.” [oh, Blackfish, you da boss]

 Lord Glover tells Jon and Sansa No. The Boltons helped him get his castle back from the Ironborn. He wants to know who is in the army then bristles that the bulk of the forces are wildlings. Sansa reminds him of the Glover oat to House Stark, but Lord Glover throws Robb's mistakes back in her face.

Yara enjoys a Volantine Whorehouse while Theon looks uncomfortable. Yara jokes at first, but then apologizes. She tells him she needs the real Theon and talks him up, telling them they will get revenge. She tells him if he is so broken he can't come back to slit his wrists and be done with it, but if he can come back they will do this—take back the Iron Islands.

 Jon, Sansa and Davos come into camp. Davos talks of the good location but Jon says the snows may come—they need to attack. They are fewer than 2500. Davos leaves to break up a fight and Sansa questions Jon trusting Davos. Sansa insists they need more men and Jon insists they need to fight now. Jon goes and Sansa sees the Maester with his ravens, so she writes a scroll, presumably to Littlefinger.

 The Elder Brother tells his stories of what he was willing to do and what it made of him. A trio of riders comes, men of R'hollor—the Brotherhood men. They ask for horses, gold, steel, food. The Elder Brother invites them for supper, but says they have mouths to feed, too. After he finds Sandor shopping wood and Sandor says “Seven save your friends.” They wax philosophical about fighting and what good (and bad) it does. The Elder Brother invites Sandor to dinner, but he keeps chopping.

Arya buys passage on a ship to Westeros. She shows them enough coin for a cabin and insists they leave a day early (tomorrow at sunrise). She looks out over Bravos and an old woman approaches., then slices at her, spins her, removes her face (it's the waif) and stabs her. Arya throws her head back into the waif's face and jumps over the bridge into the water. When she climbs out she wanders through the streets bleeding.

 Sandor is breaking branches for kindling and hears screams. All the people have been slaughtered. The Elder Brother hanged. Sandor takes an ax and goes.


Review 

 I half expected Gendry to be the smith in that opening scene, eh? Too much to ask, I suppose, but THE HOUND! Man, it was nice to see him again. Many of us suspected it was coming, but still...

I do, however, wish the elder brother had given his full broken man speech. He gave an abbreviated version, but for those of you interested in the full thing, I've included it below the review.

Margaery tips her hand a bit to us, if not the High Sparrow or Septa Unella. She is playing the game, doing what she needs to to bide time and work through (work out?) a plan. She manages to get that across to her grandmother. I suspected this was what Margaery was up to, but it was nice to get a bit of confirmation. I think her main priority is helping Loras.

 Loved that Wun Wun was the first to stand up for Jon. And oh, Lady Mormont—what a fierce joy you are. Loved her. Sharp, bright and true. New when to ask questions and when she had made up her own mind. Pretty darned impressive at ten. But man... 62 men... so funny.

The Blackfish was TEH AWESOME!!!! Called Jaime at every turn. I'm still on Book Jaime's team, but Book Jaime is trying to avoid the death of Tullys. Show Jaime has lost his redemption arc, possibly for good. So GO Blackfish!

House Glover's refusal is disappointing, but it does seem fitting Robb's mistakes would bit them here and there.

 Loved Yara and Theon's talk—it was a very Greyjoy route to encouragement, but it got there in the end. I do have a little trouble with Yara being the character the show has as a lesbian, not because I object to lesbian characters, I am all for them. But book Yara is a different kind of liberated woman the show really doesn't have—a lusty, taking men because she enjoys it, not giving a damn about traditions, so I hate losing that. And then as a tough fighter woman, she is a stereotypical choice as the lesbian. Probably just me being too sensitive on the matter, but I would have preferred they make a less obvious choice and left Yara the "manizing" woman.

Jon's urgency for “now” feels a little forced to put Sansa in a position of asking Littlefinger for helped. I don't object hugely, just a quibble. I would have liked more than fear of snow to push the timeline.

 The Elder Brother's second speech is STILL not the broken man speech, but I think it did remind Sandor of the shame he eventually felt about killing Micah, a butcher's boy, when all he did was run. I loved the Elder Brother's clan and Ian McShane was a great Elder Brother. I liked the Hound's reintro—all well done. My only issue here is with the Brotherhood. The Brotherhood is meant to be taking revenge on Frey and Lannister armies. It bothers me that seems to have been totally swapped in exchange for this religious war. I know they followed R'hollor from the start (Thoros saving Beric Dondarion and all) but they never killed others for not following, and they were not the sort of thieves who killed (and in this case they left all the stuff—so this wasn't thieving, just murder). On the plus side, while it isn't book canon, I can see some great potential with the Hound roaming as a free agent again. I'd like him to overhear something about Sansa needing help and to jump into that fray. (or is he a potential Lady Stoneheart sub?--that would be one way to twist the Elder Brother's “try to do some good” --I mean it can only be good to rid the world of Freys and Lannisters, right?) 

NOOOO! Arya buying passage is a good thing, but the waif stabbing her is a complication! I wonder who she will go to for help—the acting troop maybe? Lady Crane would help her. Lara the whore? But think of the ramifications here... Arya is going to have to spend the rest of her life thinking anybody could be a faceless man, come for her.

The Broken Man Scene [From Brienne V, Feast for Crows] 

 "Ser? My lady?" said Podrick. "Is a broken man an outlaw?" 

"More or less," Brienne answered. 

 Septon Meribald disagreed. "More less than more. There are many sorts of outlaws, just as there are many sorts of birds. A sandpiper and a sea eagle both have wings, but they are not the same. The singers love to sing of good men forced to go outside the law to fight some wicked lord, but most outlaws are more like this ravening Hound than they are the lightning lord. They are evil men, driven by greed, soured by malice, despising the gods and caring only for themselves. Broken men are more deserving of our pity, though they may be just as dangerous. Almost all are common-born, simple folk who had never been more than a mile from the house where they were born until the day some lord came round to take them off to war. Poorly shod and poorly clad, they march away beneath his banners, ofttimes with no better arms than a sickle or a sharpened hoe, or a maul they made themselves by lashing a stone to a stick with strips of hide. Brothers march with brothers, sons with fathers, friends with friends. They've heard the songs and stories, so they go off with eager hearts, dreaming of the wonders they will see, of the wealth and glory they will win. War seems a fine adventure, the greatest most of them will ever know. 

 "Then they get a taste of battle. 

 "For some, that one taste is enough to break them. Others go on for years, until they lose count of all the battles they have fought in, but even a man who has survived a hundred fights can break in his hundred-and-first. Brothers watch their brothers die, fathers lose their sons, friends see their friends trying to hold their entrails in after they've been gutted by an axe. 

 "They see the lord who led them there cut down, and some other lord shouts that they are his now. They take a wound, and when that's still half-healed they take another. There is never enough to eat, their shoes fall to pieces from the marching, their clothes are torn and rotting, and half of them are shitting in their breeches from drinking bad water.
 "If they want new boots or a warmer cloak or maybe a rusted iron halfhelm, they need to take them from a corpse, and before long they are stealing from the living too, from the smallfolk whose lands they're fighting in, men very like the men they used to be. They slaughter their sheep and steal their chickens, and from there it's just a short step to carrying off their daughters too. And one day they look around and realize all their friends and kin are gone, that they are fighting beside strangers beneath a banner that they hardly recognize. They don't know where they are or how to get back home and the lord they're fighting for does not know their names, yet here he comes, shouting for them to form up, to make a line with their spears and scythes and sharpened hoes, to stand their ground. And the knights come down on them, faceless men clad all in steel, and the iron thunder of their charge seems to fill the world . . . 

 "And the man breaks. 

 "He turns and runs, or crawls off afterward over the corpses of the slain, or steals away in the black of night, and he finds someplace to hide. All thought of home is gone by then, and kings and lords and gods mean less to him than a haunch of spoiled meat that will let him live another day, or a skin of bad wine that might drown his fear for a few hours. The broken man lives from day to day, from meal to meal, more beast than man. Lady Brienne is not wrong. In times like these, the traveler must beware of broken men, and fear them . . . but he should pity them as well." 

 When Meribald was finished a profound silence fell upon their little band. Brienne could hear the wind rustling through a clump of pussywillows, and farther off the faint cry of a loon. She could hear Dog panting softly as he loped along beside the septon and his donkey, tongue lolling from his mouth. The quiet stretched and stretched, until finally she said, "How old were you when they marched you off to war?"

 "Why, no older than your boy," Meribald replied. "Too young for such, in truth, but my brothers were all going, and I would not be left behind. Willam said I could be his squire, though Will was no knight, only a potboy armed with a kitchen knife he'd stolen from the inn. He died upon the Stepstones, and never struck a blow. It was fever did for him, and for my brother Robin. Owen died from a mace that split his head apart, and his friend Jon Pox was hanged for rape."

"The War of the Ninepenny Kings?" asked Hyle Hunt.

"So they called it, though I never saw a king, nor earned a penny. It was a war, though. That it was."

Anybody want to just join me for a moment of awe. That is why George is the master. What a great speech. And I think it gives us some insight into his views on war.