The Rewatch Project: Season 5, Episode 1: The Wars to Come

Recap

Young Cersei and her friend Malara traipse through the woods to the house of a woods witch. They wake the woman and Cersei rudely lets her know she is not nearly as impressive as she's heard, then demands the woman tell their future. The witch gives her a knife and says she needs to taste her blood so Cersei slices her thumb and the woman sucks it, then says Cersei can ask three questions. Cersei asks when she will marry the prince. The witch says she will marry the queen. Cersei confirms she will be queen, and the witch confirms, but finishes that it will be until one younger and more beautiful replaces her and takes all she holds dear. And finally Cersei asks about children. The king will have twenty and Cersei three. Gold will be their crowns and gold their shrouds. Meaning they will die before Cersei.

Adult Cersei rides in a litter to the sept. She demands to go in alone and finds Jaime standing watch over Tywin's body. Jaime says the vague “they” will try to tear them apart now, but Cersei puts the blame solidly on Jaime for letting Tyrion go. She kisses Tywin's head and leaves again.

Tyrion peeks out a hole in his crate as Varys pries it open. Tyrion dives for the wine and feels sorry for himself. They are at the home of Illario Mopatis (where Dany and Viserys lived for a time). Varys gives a pretty darned good sales pitch for at least meeting Danaerys.

The slaves and Unsullied pull down the harpy in Meereen, then an Unsullied goes to a whore for a snuggle. Unfortunately, as they settle in, she slits his throat. He looks up to see the Harpy's mask. When Dany learns she insists he will have a burial in the Temple of the Graces. This will piss off the Sons of the Harpy, but she says that is good. Angry snakes stick their necks out, which makes it easier to chop off their heads. Missendei then finds Grey Worm, trying to understand why Unsullied would seek prostitutes.

Jon trains Ollie at Castle Black. Gilly asks if Sam should be training, then they fret about Ser Alliser's views of wildlings. If Ser Alliser is made Lord Commander, Gilly won't be allowed to stay. Sam says where she goes, he goes. Melisandre comes to Jon and says the King wants to see him, then she rides the lift with him, asking awkwardly if he is a virgin.

Jon kneels before Stannis. Stannis asks if Jon knows who rules at Winterfell and asks if he doesn't want to root the Boltons out. Jon says he wants a great many things, but he is a sworn brother of the Night's Watch. Davos says some of the brothers feel Jon has too much affinity for the Wildlings. Jon says they are not monsters. Stannis shares his plans and says he needs men. At first Jon misunderstands and says the Night's Watch don't take sides, but Stannis means the wildlings—he will forgive them and give them land if they fight for him. He asks Jon to make the case to Mance.

Sansa, Littlefinger and Lord Royce watch Robin pathetically sparring and discuss his lack of skill, but at least he has an important name. They leave Sweetrobin with Lord Royce to tour the Vale, supposedly to go to The Fingers, though Sansa notes they are going West. He says they are going somewhere Cersei cannot get her hands on Sansa.

Loras Tyrell gives words of comfort to Cersei. She thanks him and blows him off. Lancel shows up, head shaved and in monks robes. Kevan explains that he is a sparrow—a group of religious zealots. Lancel finds Cersei and apologizes to her for leading her to temptation. He also mentions the incident with Robert and his wine. He has found peace in the Light of the Seven and tells her she can too.

Olivar the whore outlines Loras's birthmark, noting it is shaped like Dorne. Margaery burst in, scolding Loras for his lateness. When Olivar leaves she tells Loras he should be more discreet. They discuss Cersei. Margaery sounds like she has a plan.

Tyrion and Varys make jibes, Tyrion still feeling sorry for himself. He asks why Varys freed him. It was for the Seven Kingdoms. Tyrion says he's done with them but Varys points out his skills. He gives his pitch for Danaerys.

Hizdar and Daario return to Meereen and give a positive report. It sounds good, but the Masters want some concessions. They would like to re-open the fighting pits. Dany says no. In bed later Daario says she should open them. He made his way in the world starting in the fighting pits. He also suggests she needs to use her dragons. A dragon queen with no dragons is not a queen. She goes to see them but they're pissed at her.

Jon goes to Mance to tell him what Stannis wants, but Mance already knows. Jon tries to present the importance of saving all his people but Mance ends it with one of the best lines ever: The freedom to make my owns mistakes is all I ever wanted.

Surprise ending...

Mance is walked out to the pyre, tied to a stake and Melisandre gives her pedantic zealot speech then lights him afire. Everyone watches as Mance gets uncomfortable, then the flames reach him. He manages not to scream. Jon leaves, Gilly hides her face and Selyse has an orgasm. Then Jon shoots an arrow into Mance's heard from a walkway.


Discussion

Of course when Cersei asks when she will marry the prince, she is referring to Rhaegar, and when the woods witch says she will marry the King, she thinks that is still who it refers to. And the younger more beautiful queen who will take it all from her? Of course this informs so much about how Cersei behaves first toward Sansa, then Margaery. Finally, I'm disappointed the prophecy didn't mention the Valonqar from the books. The last line in the book is: And when your tears have drowned you, the valonqar shall wrap his hands about your pale white throat and choke the life from you. Powerful stuff. A valonqar, in old Valyrian means “little brother” (both Jaime and Tyrion are younger than Cersei) but it says THE valonqar, not YOUR valonqar, so it may not even be HER little brother. It may be the little brother of anyone she has harmed (the little brother of that queen?) and because High Valyrian is gender bendy, it may not even be a male, but any younger sibling (my money is on Arya).

I am so not a fan of pouty Tyrion. I like Varys here, but Tyrion is hard to watch until later in the season.

Also not thrilled with it being Stannis who wants the Wildlings to come through the wall. Jon makes that decision in the books—he asks for one of ten men to stay and serve at the wall, desperately trying to replenish the men at the Wall. It is a huge part of the reason for what happens at the end of the season.

On watching this episode again, there are only a few things HERE that bug me. Mel's come on to Jon, Tyrion the pathetic depressed imp, Loras so glibly having his fling with Olivar (Loras of the books truly loved Renly. He wasn't some randy slut). But what actually bugs me is stuff they skipped or changed.

The Rewatch Project: Season 4, Episode 10: The Children

Recap

Jon heads north through the wildling dead. He marches into Mance's camp with his arms up. Mance comments on his black cloak and Jon says he's there to negotiate. Mance expresses unhappiness with Jon's lack of loyalty, but Jon says he was always loyal to the Night's Watch. They discuss Ygritte and drink to her, then toast Mag the Mighty and Grenn.

Mance says he's sent 400 men to climb the wall. They don't want to conquer. They just want to get on the other side of the wall. He says if they let him through, no one else will die. Otherwise all of them will. They hear a commotion and Mance wonders if Jon has tricked him, but it is not Jon's men. It's Stannis's army.

Davos introduces Stannis who says it's customary to kneel, but Mance says north of the wall they do not do that.

Qyburn, Pycelle and Cersei look over the Mountain, Pycelle insisting there is nothing else to do but milk of the poppy to make passing more comfortable. Qyburn insists he can. Cersei sends Pycelle away and asks if Qyburn can save the Mountain. He says there is a chance and she promises him anything he needs.

Cersei comes to Tywin about her betrothal. She insists she will stay at King's Landing with her son. She reminds him the lengths she will go to when her son is in danger and threatens that she will burn their house to the ground before leaving Tommen. She says she will tell the truth about her and Jaime. Tywin won't believe it is true at first. His legacy is a lie. She then goes to Jaime and tells him what she did.

Missendei strings out Danaerys's title, then a former slave, a tutor, tells his story and asks if he can sell himself back to his former master. Dany tries to argue, but he has a point, so she allows him to make a contract of not more than one year. A shepherd comes in then, unable to speak the common tongue but tells the story of the thing coming from the sky—the black one... and lays down the burned bones of his daughter. Drogon has not been seen, but Dany takes Rhaegal and Viserion and locks them in the catacombs. Neither is happy.

Aemon says a memorial and they burn the dead Night's Watch brothers. And now their watch is ended. Melissandre spots Jon through the flames.

Jon goes to see Tormund. He asks if Tromund wants to say any words for the wildling dead, but Tormund says the dead won't hear. He asks if Jon loved Ygritte and says she loved him—Tormund knows because she kept talking about killing him. He then says she belongs north of the wall, so Jon takes her body north and builds a pyre by the weirwood.

Hodor pulls Brann and they finally spot the tree. Jojen is having trouble but they've nearly made it. As they climb the hill, the dead start breaking through the snow and grabbing at them. They have to fight. Brann finally wargs into Hodor to give them extra fighting power. It's going well until a white heads for Brann—Summer saves him, but the distraction allows a white to stab Jojen. Then a child comes out with fireballs to help. Jojen insists Meera go with Brann so she kills him first then runs. The child throws fire at Jojen so he won't become a white. The rest of them get into the tree where the whites can't come. The child leads Brann to the three-eyed raven. He tells them Jojen always knew his fate. He has been watching all of them all their lives. He tells Brann he will not walk again, but he will fly.

Brienne scolds Pod as the horses have disappeared. In searching Brienne comes upon Arya practicing her water dancing. Arya warns the Hound (who is off screen) that people are coming. Brienne greets Arya. They discuss swords and who taught them to fight.

It's all good until the Hound comes and Pod recognizes him. Brienne tells Arya she swore to her mother to keep her safe. Arya is skeptical and The Hound says there is nowhere safe. The Hound and Brienne have a proper battle. It ends with the Hound thrown over an embankment, but Arya has disappeared. Arya stays hidden until they go, then finds the Hound. He wants her to kill him, but instead she steals his gold and leaves.

Jaime comes for Tyrion. A galley is waiting in the bay for him. Jaime gives instructions and the two hug good-bye. Instead of going directly, however, Tyrion climbs to the Tower of the Hand. He finds Shae in Tywin's bed. Shae calls him “my Lion” before turning to see that it is Tyrion and not Tywin. She grabs a knife. The two fight, and he ends up strangling her with her necklace.

Tyrion apologizes to her, then finds a cross bow and goes to find his father. Tywin is sitting on the privy. Tywin asks who released him. He wants to talk his his room but Tyrion says he can't because he killed Shae there. Tywin asks if he is afraid of a dead whore, to which Tyrion gives a warning not to use the word whore again. When he does, Tyrion puts a bolt into Tywin, who is shocked. He gets mad and says “You are no son of mine” and Tyrion shoots him again.

Varys puts Tyrion in a box for the ship ride, then the bells begin ringing and Varys decided he needs to go, too.

Arya rides to the sea seeking a ship to Eastwatch, the Night's Watch castle on the east shore. The captain she finds is not going north—he tells her there is war north. That he is going home to Bravos. At that point she pulls out her coin from Jaqen and says, “Valar Morghulis.” “Valar Dhohiris,” the captain says back and says Arya will have a cabin. The last shot is of Arya on the prow looking as they cross the sea.

Review

This is another fantastic episode. I really love season 4. When you can say Stannis routing the wildlings is the weakest bit, you know it is great stuff. There was true heartbreak (Dany locking up her dragons after seeing that toddler's bones), there was twisted triumph (Cersei confessing to Tywin) and true triumph (Tyrion killing his father). And Arya headed to Bravos. Bran getting to the tree was hard to watch, but we've been waiting for this for ages.

The Rewatch Project: Season 4, Episode 9: The Watchers on the Wall

Recap

Sam and Jon head for watch atop the wall discussing Ygritte. Sam gets technical about what the Night's Watch vows mean, then he makes it clear Jon is no poet on his description of sex. Jon sends Sam to get some sleep.

An owl that is warged watches and brings a message to the wildlings and Torman tells his tale about his bear. Ygritte loses her temper and wants to think only of her arrows. The Thenn leader accuses Ygritte of letting Jon go, but she forbids anyone else from touching him, as Jon is hers to kill.

Sam and Aemon discuss wildlings. Aemon insists Sam loves Gilly. He tells Sam a story of a girl he loved, then sends Sam to bed.

Gilly arrives at the wall and Sam insists they let her in. He tells her from now on, wherever she goes, he will go. Two horns sound.

The warg says it's time and the wildlings south of the wall set out. At Castle Black the men prepare, Jon atop the wall sees the fire Mance had said was the sign. Alliser says Jon can say it. They should have sealed the tunnel.

Sam settles Gilly into a store cellar. She argues with him about leaving her, but he insists a man of the Night's Watch has to do his duty and he kisses her. He then promises he won't die.

Pip and Sam prepare to defend. Pip frets, but Sam talks him down.

Ygritte watches and reports back to the wildlings on numbers on the south side of the wall. The wildlings attack from both sides. Janos comes to the top of the wall insisting Alliser is needed below. Alliser leaves Janos in charge but Janos is a panicky, worthless leader, so Grenn tells him he is needed below and Jon takes command.

Pip frets about dying. Wildlings clime the walls. Alliser gives a good speech. The wildlings breech the southern wall and battle breaks out. On the other side, climbers start up the wall.

Battle rages. Janos panics and hides himself in the same cellar Gilly is in. Pip gets an arrow in the neck and Sam holds him as he dies.

A giant and mammoth begin pulling at the gate at the base of the wall. Jon sends Grenn and five recruits to hold the inner gate. He then calls for oil at the top of the wall.

Sam goes down to join the fighting and by fluke kills a Thenn. He asked Grenn for more men, but Grenn is on his mission and tells Sam he needs to go up and ask Jon.

At the top of the wall they drop burning oil. The mammoth below understandably panics and as he runs away, one of the giants gets hit in the back in what must be exactly the right spot and falls. The other giant howls with rage and begins to heave up the gate on his own.

Sam tells Jon Ser Alliser has fallen and he is needed below. Jon leaves Edd in charge.

Grenn and his men hold the gate, taking inspiration from the Night's Watch vows.

Jon sends Sam for Ghost and then roles into supreme fighting mode. He has a lengthy battle with the lead Then, then staggers to stand in front of Ygritte. He is unarmed and she aims at him but can't seem to shoot, then an arrow comes out her chest. Freaking Ollie. She dies in Jon's arms.

To the north side of the wall the climb up the wall continues. Edd calls for the scythe to be dropped and they are all knocked down, one short an arm. The wildlings retreat for the night.

Tormund is captured. Sam and Gilly reunite

Jon intends to find Mance to kill Mance. It's a bad plan, but there's no better one. On the way through the wall, Sam and Jon find Grenn and his men, along with the dead giant—they held the wall.

Jon leaves Sam with Longclaw and heads out north.


Review

The episode is strong, but it is all action. I realize I am probably in the minority on this, but I like a bit more pacing variety in episodes. Ygritte dying was beautiful and emotional. And Sam promising Gilly he's live was great. And Janos hiding with Gilly was it's own kind of great (funny, since Janos is so pathetic). There were feels related to both Pip and Grenn. I just like an episode that is not all one thing a bit better. Don't get me wrong. I gave it 92 out of 100—this is not BAD at all. Just not as strong as the last two, in my opinion.

The Rewatch Project: Season 4, Episode 8: The Mountain and the Viper

Recap

Men dig for treasure in Mole's Town. One of the whores harasses Gilly about her baby waking her. Gilly hears a signal and gives warning but the woman doesn't believe her. The village is attacked by wildlings. Nearly everyone is killed outright, though Ygritte finds Gilly and her baby hiding and just motions them to keep quiet.

Sam frets over the attack. The brothers argue over not being allowed to leave the castle to defend the area, but they are too few to lessen the number and still be able to put up a fight at the castle. Jon notes if they've hit Mole's Town, Castle Black is next. They talk numbers and Edd asks if the last of them alive will burn the others.

The Unsullied wash and bathe in a stream. Grey Worm sees Missendei and gazes at her admiringly. She and Dany discuss it, wondering what interest Unsullied would have with women. Grey Worm comes to Missendei later to apologize. He tells her her lessons in the common tongue are precious to him. She says she is sorry he was cut, but he is philosophical. He says had he not been he would never have been bought by Danaerys or met Missendei. She says she is glad he saw her.

Ramsay prepares Theon to take Moat Cailin. Theon goes in and tells them if they leave they will be allowed safe passage to the stony shore. They are sick and dying, but the Captain spurns him. In response one of his men kills him “to go home safely”. Of course Ramsay lied about that and they are all flayed...

Littlefinger is questioned by the Lords of the Vale who finally bring up a witness. The girl. “Alaine” comes out and admits she is Sansa Stark, noting she had met Lord Royce when he came north taking his son to the wall. She then admits Littlefinger told many lies—all to protect her. She weaves her tale of being saved and Lysa's jealousy that ends in suicide. They believe her. Littlefinger looks impressed.

Littlefinger then tells what he thinks should be done with Robin—taking him out to survey his lands and meet the Lords of the Vale. It is time for him to grow up.

A boy brings Ser Barristan a letter—a copy of Jorah's pardon. Barristan confronts Jorah, then Jorah comes before the queen. Dany is furious. He wants to talk alone, but she refuses and she banishes him.

Ramsay presents the flag of Moat Cailin to Roose. Roose points out the north and they discuss Locke and the Stark boys, then Roose presents Ramsay with a decree legitimizing him. Ramsay promises to be worthy and they ride for Winterfell.

Littlefinger asks Sansa why she backed him up. She says at least she knows what he wants.

Arya thought Joffrey's death would make her happy. The Hound thought poison was lame, but Arya says she would kill with anything. They reach the Bloody Gate and learns Lysa is dead. Arya laughs hysterically.

Robin is afraid to leave the Vale. Littlefinger gives a string of ways people die right in their homes. He tells him to take charge of his life. Sansa comes down the stairs with a die job and a dramatic dress.

Tyrion and Jaime discuss the Gods and their cousin Orson. Tyrion is brought out for the trial by combat. Oberyn kisses Ellaria and drinks wine. Ellaria is alarmed when she sees the Mountain. Pycelle gives a droning intro until a horn blows. Oberyn comes out with a spear. The Mountain stands with a sword. Oberyn tells who he is and why he intends to kill the Mountain, but first he wants to hear a confession and who gave the order. He keeps yelling “You raped her, you murdered her, you killed her children” as he dances around tiring the Mountain. The Mountain throws him around a bit breaks his spear but he gets another. Then Oberyn manages to hamstring the Mountain and stabs a spear through his middle, still demanding the confession. He looks up at the audience as he talks and the Mountain knocks his feet out from under him, then breaks his teeth, confesses, and crushes Oberyn's skull. Tywin sentences Tyrion to death.

RIP Oberyn, you sexy beast

Review

I love this episode. In fact thus far it barely behind episode 1.9 for the best episode of all. The are two in season 6 that might pass it, but seriously, I bet it is in my top 5 ever. There is everything to love. Or maybe it is that the normal stuff was normal (raid on Mole's town was probably the worst scene, but it wasn't bad and it had the feature I liked of Ygritte letting Gilly go). The Orson/beetle bit was weird, but I liked the rest of that—I always like Tyrion and Jaime. The Castle Black scene is made awesome by Edd. Loved Arya. But the two homeruns are Sansa selling her story to the Lords of the Vale and EVERYTHING about Oberyn. That fight scene had excellent subtle details, too—Jaime and Cersei and their opposite responses at each turn in the fight was brilliant—sort of an opposites mirror going on.

The Rewatch Project: Season 4, Episode 7: Mockingbird

Recap

Tyrion and Jaime bicker about Tyrion's outburst and demand for a trial by combat. Tyrion points out that the deal would have given Tywin everything he wanted and it felt good to take it from him. Jaime says he can't save Tyrion—he can't fight with his left hand. Tyrion asks for Bronn, then he asks who fights for the crown.

The scene cuts to the Mountain cutting down men.

Arya and the Hound find a burned village and a dying man. They wax philosophical and finally the Hound mercy kills him, showing Arya where the heart is. They are attacked by Rorge and Biter, the Biter biting the Hound before being killed. Arya told the Hound who the men were and what they threatened. He asks if he is on Arya's list, but she doesn't know his name. The Hound asks his name and when she hears Rorge, she stabs him through the heart.

A horn blows at the wall. Jon's group has returned from Craster's. Jon gives a report, warning them to prepare for the wildlings. He says they should fill the tunnels with rocks and then water and freeze them shut. Ser Alliser shames Jon, reminding him he's a steward and asking the Master Builder what he recommends. They leave it as is. #decisionsthatcomebacktobite

Bronn comes to Tyrion's cell dressed in in new clothes. He's getting married. They discuss the price to fight fr Tyrion and basically there is not enough money in the world. Bronn is set comfortably and doesn't want to die. They part as friends.

Daario is in Dany's chamber—he came through the window and offers her flowers. She scolds him and he begs leave to go fight for her—he is wasted in the city. She reminds him of his oath and then tells him to undress.

Selyse comes in while Melisandre is bathing. Mel asks for a vial to put something in her bath. She makes a bad joke which leads to compliments that Selyse wants the truth. Selyse warns that Stannis wants to bring Shireen with them and she thinks it's a bad idea, but Melisandre says the princess must come.

Daario leaves Dany's quarters early, running into Jorah who then tells Dany she can't trust Daario. Dany says she sent Daario to retake Yunkai, executing all the masters. Jorah points out that treating the masters like slaves or worse is just as bad. She needs to show them another way. He points out that he wouldn't be there to help Dany if Ned Stark had done what Dany has planned. She changes strategy, telling Jorah to send Hizdhar with Jorah to present the options. Change or die.

The Hound's wound is festering but he won't allow burning the infection away. He freaks and says he regrets ever laying eyes on Arya as she has put a price on his head. He then tells her the story of being burned. She offers to wash and sew his wound.

Brienne and Pod share a meat pie served by Hot Pie. Hot Pie sits down with them, sharing the secret of a good pie (it's the gravy). He notes Brienne's armor and asks if she's a knight. Brienne asks if he's seen Sansa and describes her. Hot Pie freaks and starts to leave but Brienne says she swore to the Stark girl's mother to deliver them safely home. Outside Pod suggests she should be more discreet but Hot Pie comes out and tells them that he saw Arya with the Brotherhood. And the Hound.

They debate where Arya would go. Pot knows Lysa Arron is Arya's last living relative with the means to pay a ransom.

Oberyn comes to see Tyrion in my more favorite scene ever. Oberyn tells Tyrion of meeting him before, of being gravely disappointed. Of hearing of the monster and then being presented with just a baby. Oberyn wants justice. “I will be your champion.”

Sansa finds it snowing and is filled with hope. She builds a snow Winterfell. Robin comes out and freaks that there is no moon door. When he tries to put one in he knocks over a tower and Sansa yells at him for ruining it, which causes him to kick down the rest. Sansa slaps him. Petyr comes out and they discuss home and why Petyr killed Joffrey. He kisses her and Lysa is watching.

Lysa calls Sansa to her and tries to push her through the moon door. Petyr stops her as Lysa has her fit. He tells her he will send Sansa away and he goes to Lysa explaining he has only ever loved one woman. He says, “Your sister” as he shoves her through the moon door.

Review

This is one of my favorite episodes. I like the change in Arya and the Hound's relationship. I liked Brienne getting a bit of Stark news. I loved Sansa in the snow--it was the first time she has felt hopeful since her hopes of marrying Loras were crushed, but more importantly, we can actually see her remembering she is a Stark. It's been way too long. I even liked watching Lysa pushed through the moon door. It was strangely satisfying. But NOTHING lives up to Oberyn's story and telling Tyrion he will be his champion. That is truly one of my very favorite scenes. Maybe my actual favorite scene. The Mel and Selyse scene is slightly awkward--gratuitous nudity. But I do like the drop of fear added because we all know why Melisandre is insisting the princess come with them--she has king's blood. Overall the episode only had two scenes I'd rank medium and the rest were really good--that is a high ratio.